Excuse me? Mother Nature? May we have a word?

Dear Mother Nature,

I want to begin by saying I love you. I really do. You have some of the most amazing creations. I love the crisp fall days when there is just a slight chill in the air and the changing leaves make hills look like an exquisitely designed quilt. I love dandelions. They make me smile because they are so bright and sunny and simply everywhere. I love trees that are covered in snow and diamond colored ice when the sun sparkles through them. I love the majestically terrifying way a storm front moves over my house making me shiver with apprehension and appreciation.

However, I wondered if you were aware of the date. It's April. Three weeks ago we had 80 degree days. Spring has arrived officially according to my calendar. I have seen my first Robin hopping anxiously around the yard, a traditional sign in my family that spring has indeed sprung.

That being said, what the hell is going on? I have awoken the past two days to a snow covered yard and vehicle. I've had to keep my heat at 70 degrees because I had taken down the plastic draft covers from my windows. My kids had to unhappily deposit their bikes back into the winterized shed. All winter coats, hats, mittens and boots had to be removed from bedroom closets and hung by the door once again. My heating blanket is back on high to combat the 30 degree nightly temperatures.

I don't mean to be whiny. Maybe you're just suffering from the worst universal case of P.M.S. ever. Maybe you were hoping we'd take Al Gore more seriously. Could this perhaps be a belated April fools joke? Whatever the reason I would appreciate it if you could stop now. Whatever point you are trying to make, I don't get it, but I do get that your mad as hell. But really, enough is enough.


No comments: